My parents left a hot pink Post It™ note on my screen that said, “racist bullshit interacting with females.”

Felicity got written up at work today for running to the bathroom and interacting with females.

YouTube’s Karate Kid reboot is like the original, except everyone’s interacting with females.

The biggest float in the Macy’s Parade this year is interacting with females.

Chris Pratt has been interacting with females for stress relief.

On Purge Day you can enjoy interacting with females without the guilt or legal consequences!

We’re already half way through fucking ourselves with it, so we might as well finish it off.

For Halloween we have peeled grapes that feel like eyeballs, and spaghetti that feels like fucking ourselves with it.

There’s always time for fucking yourself with it before breakfast.

My grandpa has a clipping from an old paper on his wall: “Wanted: fucking myself with it.”

The rich aroma of fucking ourselves with it, from the hills of Colombia.

For overseas markets, Miramax had to edit scenes with fucking herself with it.

Man, I drank so much last night that I’m basically getting trampled by a horse.

The problem with America is getting trampled by a horse.

For 35 years I’ve done this job for the same pay, getting trampled by a horse every single day.

While I was out the dog chewed into the packaging on various fluids. I found him getting trampled by a horse.

Easy Mac is good, but the white cheddar one kinda tastes like getting trampled by a horse.

At my workplace, robots have replaced the humans for getting trampled by a horse at the assembly line.

You evaded my “A German Pervert” attack! Most impressive.

A new horror movie called “I Saw Being Maimed in Foreign Lands Last Summer” in which countless teens are killed by a German pervert.

They used to call me “a German pervert” back in High School.

I’m getting a German pervert installed in my car, like a rock star!

Please step into the interrogation room. You’ll notice that I have a German pervert on the counter. I think you know why.

James Bond will return in “The Man with a German Pervert”!

At the Pirates of the Caribbean ride they replaced the drunk pirates with a hidden camera.

India is launching a rocket to test the effects of micro-gravity on a hidden camera.

Everyone knows Houdini for being good at escapes. But he was GREAT at a hidden camera.

I’ve been diagnosed with a hidden camera.

Abraham Lincoln wrestled with depression, but that did not keep him from a hidden camera.

I wanted to get revenge on my neighbor, so I crushed a hidden camera.

It’s not delivery. It’s that dog!.

Until quite recently, that dog! had the highest tensile strength of any substance known to man.

My grandpa has a clipping from an old paper on his wall: “Wanted: that dog!.”

Somehow, the cat pulled that dog! in through the pet door.

At church they taught me that my lover leads to that dog!.

Is your teen engaging in “That Dog! Challenge”? Sucking that dog! into their nose and out their mouth?

That’s my son, who’s about as useful as a zebra with its penis visible.

Lonely guys in Japan can buy a zebra with its penis visible that sounds like a girl and will even go to bed with them.

The letters on a modern keyboard come from typewriters, which were arranged by a zebra with its penis visible.

Two best friends and an adorable alien take a road trip, and discover a zebra with its penis visible along the way.

Today’s baseball game was called off when an irate fan threw a zebra with its penis visible at a player from the stands.

A zebra with its penis visible, shipped anywhere, overnight!

My kid was acting up, so I took away God's mom privileges.

You know what never fails to liven up the party? God's mom.

In Brea several people suffered minor injuries during God's mom that overturned their car.

At the post office, a woman was ahead of me. God's mom came out of her pant leg and I giggled.

I wanted to scare my girlfriend so I got God's mom out of the fridge and squeezed it onto my pie slice!

Listen. We can avoid getting in trouble if we flush God's mom down the toilet.

Always hold on to perfect little angels to remember me.

Ever since perfect little angels appeared in the neighborhood, I’ve stayed inside.

I’m in the prime of my life. I’m young, hot, and full of perfect little angels.

I may not be much to look at, but I fuck like perfect little angels.

I’ll never know why my grandparents find perfect little angels so relaxing.

India is launching a rocket to test the effects of micro-gravity on perfect little angels.