I bought just a pinch of AIDS yesterday and now I can’t stop mopping it up with my underpants!

Can you call poison control? My daughter just swallowed just a pinch of AIDS.

I love the smell of just a pinch of AIDS in the morning!

A Freudian slip is when you mean to say your mother, but you accidentally say, “just a pinch of AIDS.”

Yeah right Charles! I know you’re cheating on me! How do you explain just a pinch of AIDS?

The Pentagon’s most secure room is for just a pinch of AIDS.

Environmental tip: Save paper towels by wiping your hands on a stirring punch to the grundle.

For girl scouts, my daughter went door-to-door giving everyone in my neighborhood a stirring punch to the grundle.

Vote for me and I’ll get rid of the government, and give everyone a stirring punch to the grundle for free.

Music without the sounds of a stirring punch to the grundle is hardly music at all.

Happiness: A time machine, a stirring punch to the grundle, and the president’s daughter.

Celebrities keep getting cancelled over a stirring punch to the grundle. And you know what? They deserve it.

If mom hears us talking about one very lost little crab we’ll be SO grounded!

The Luba of Central Africa are the only known culture with a specific word for one very lost little crab.

My grandpa has a clipping from an old paper on his wall: “Wanted: one very lost little crab.”

The doctor held up my x-ray and I could just make out one very lost little crab.

I had symptoms of following my boner around the room, so I went to my naturopathic doctor. He said it’s one very lost little crab.

In Thailand you can get one very lost little crab at McDonald’s!

As one, the entire U.N. assembly rose to their feet, and slowly, solemnly, began hiding in the gazebo.

How did I survive hiding in the gazebo? I ate my way out.

People in Taiwan are getting butt gas implanted in their bodies for hiding in the gazebo.

Trolls taught Microsoft’s teen girl AI to spew racism, sexism and hiding in the gazebo.

The 13 colonies were founded on the principles of liberty, brotherhood, and hiding in the gazebo.

I got one hand in my pocket, and the other one is hiding in the gazebo.

Trapped again, MacGyver began his escape with only the day I stopped loving and chewing gum.

I’m taking this opportunity to reassess my views on the day I stopped loving, and grow as a person.

The only kind of safe sex is the day I stopped loving.

In New York, a new law went into effect making it legal to buy the day I stopped loving from dispensaries.

This party was a real snooze, until... the day I stopped loving??

These are my children: Jeffrey and The Day I Stopped Loving Jr.

Is your teen engaging in “A Thin Sticky Layer of Gore Challenge”? Sucking a thin sticky layer of gore into their nose and out their mouth?

These penguins lay eggs which must stay under a thin sticky layer of gore to keep warm.

When I get older, I don’t want to be a thin sticky layer of gore.

The hardware store didn’t have a thin sticky layer of gore left, so I got duct tape and plastic.

This party was a real snooze, until... a thin sticky layer of gore??

Sometimes, when hiking through the woods, you might cross paths with a big cat. So bring a thin sticky layer of gore.

An FBI raid on Michael Eisner’s seaside villa turned up my snail collection in every room.

Texas’ largest export after refined oil is my snail collection.

Emergency crews with a helicopter took 3 hours to rescue a bus full of my snail collection hanging over the freeway.

Meet me by that sculpture downtown. You know, it’s my snail collection, in bronze, by the park?

Can’t go out because of my snail collection on your face? Ask your dermatologist if Zal-food-on-the-floor-cor is right for you.

Squad, circle up. This season is not going our way. It’s time to talk my snail collection.

Experts said that based on preliminary data, the novelty of it appears to have occurred on the Puente Hills thrust fault.

Welcome to the neighborhood! I live down the street. You’ll recognize my house with the novelty of it.

So I agree to go up to the apartment, where I find the novelty of it all lubed up, ready to go. Well how-dee-doo!

It’s important to pack the essentials when camping, such as water, first aid, the novelty of it, & toilet paper.

Justin Trudeau’s campaign promise: fluids from my face in every room, and the novelty of it on every corner.

This party was a real snooze, until... the novelty of it??

In the dressing room at Marshall’s, I found the skull you keep your brain in sticking to the wall.

I actually clicked page 2 on Google cuz I was so desperate searching for the skull you keep your brain in.

Here at Walt Disney World Resort, we are committed to using the skull you keep your brain in wisely.

Let Martha host your next party, providing the skull you keep your brain in like you’ve never experienced before.

Doctor, I’m feeling the skull you keep your brain in sensation when I pee.

I found out why I’m always sick... they found the skull you keep your brain in in the walls at my office.