John "_____" Smith. The genius who brought us _____.2
John "unbelievably beautiful hair" Smith. The genius who brought us a fifteen-pound newborn. John "a quiver of love arrows" Smith. The genius who brought us setbacks. John "sex smell" Smith. The genius who brought us torturing your family. John "poorly orchestrated group sex" Smith. The genius who brought us real, actual witchcraft. John "the NAACP" Smith. The genius who brought us a very hot pan. John "ill-advised business decisions" Smith. The genius who brought us Disneyland!.
_____ will have to do because we still need time for _____ if we want to ready for the party.2
white-knuckled terror will have to do because we still need time for going out on a limb if we want to ready for the party. an alibi will have to do because we still need time for a madhouse! A madhouse! if we want to ready for the party. the thin veneer of causality that underlies porn will have to do because we still need time for the hole where the heart once fit if we want to ready for the party. a listless wasp will have to do because we still need time for a bad chicken if we want to ready for the party. my love of children will have to do because we still need time for an empty Tic Tac® box if we want to ready for the party. a powerful skeleton, William Howard Taft will have to do because we still need time for Voodoo driving school if we want to ready for the party.
John "_____" Smith. The genius who brought us _____.2
John "hot naughty bodies" Smith. The genius who brought us lifting off the toilet. John "a van down by the river" Smith. The genius who brought us flailing. John "fart jokes and naughty cave paintings" Smith. The genius who brought us turning tricks on the street corner. John "a lumberjack orgy" Smith. The genius who brought us a bang-up job. John "Caesar’s last breath" Smith. The genius who brought us hyperactive legs. John "five full-time chefs" Smith. The genius who brought us the island and everyone on it.
John "_____" Smith. The genius who brought us _____.2
John "steady pumping" Smith. The genius who brought us your husband. John "hiding with your warriors" Smith. The genius who brought us compost. John "white man’s burden" Smith. The genius who brought us beets. Mashed beets. John "spines" Smith. The genius who brought us new rules from on high. John "a mutilated torso" Smith. The genius who brought us the NAACP. John "being dipped in chocolate" Smith. The genius who brought us an exploitative sex tape.
I chipped my tooth on a conservative state. My dentist said I’m lucky it wasn’t a conservative state. The doctor held up my x-ray and I could just make out a conservative state. The only way to make sense out of a conservative state is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance. Go, go, Gadget a Conservative State! Dear diary, today I went into the city and saw a conservative state for the first time! Daddy! There’s a conservative state under my bed. Kill it kill it!
Conservative states are banning the use of _____ for _____.2
Conservative states are banning the use of a flagrant misuse of the English language for Portuguese possessions. Conservative states are banning the use of a remarkably swift recovery for an all-black cast. Conservative states are banning the use of an impressively rendered vagina for the yellow line down the middle of the road. Conservative states are banning the use of smooshy cats on the glass for a guillotine. Conservative states are banning the use of security clearance for potent neurotoxins. Conservative states are banning the use of mammaries for little turds everywhere.
2016 Mar 31 at 14:32 PDT
— Ed. 2016 Mar 31 at 16:53 PDT
NatureJay SJA: Commander of Ruthless Abuse
2005 Mar 22 • 1871
574 ₧
A friend had this appear in the spam filter of his website and now I'm curious if it will be one of the great white cards.
Enormous opportunities in the grinding machine
Enormous opportunities in the grinding machine is like war: easy to begin but very hard to stop. Squad, circle up. It’s time to talk Enormous opportunities in the grinding machine. My religion demands that I must always have Enormous opportunities in the grinding machine, and that I must abstain from a merry mishap. To brew a love potion, besides eye of newt you need violent death and Enormous opportunities in the grinding machine. At the skating rink there was Enormous opportunities in the grinding machine and everyone fell down at once. I got into my car and sat on Enormous opportunities in the grinding machine. Slowly, a smile crept over my face.
In WHITE CARDS: n -- noun, defaults to singular np -- plural noun nc -- noncountable noun, like "ice cream" or "empathy" v -- verb, like "shaking my bum" vt -- transitive verb, like just "shaking" w -- weird stuff that doesn't really fit
code
In BLACK CARDS: n -- any noun s -- singular nouns only p -- plural nouns only c -- noncountable nouns only pc -- plural or noncountable nouns v -- any verb t -- a transitive verb scv -- a singular or noncountable noun, or a verb
I’m undergoing immersion therapy by continually exposing myself to my zipper. When the research team activated the interdimensional portal, my zipper emerged. The new hit reality show: Can You Swallow my zipper? On Ebay you can get my zipper but it comes in several tiny boxes. I heard you can rent a friend in Tokyo, but only if you aren’t both my zipper. Though mortally wounded by three shots to his abdomen, the Secret Service agent returned fire, killing the assassin with my zipper.
lollipops with bugs in them np
Populations of endangered rhinoceros are threatened by lollipops with bugs in them and tiny uranium rods. Lollipops with bugs in them... like a woman’s. In the end, the obvious plot twist was that the serial killer was actually lollipops with bugs in them. We finally hired a guy at work to take care of lollipops with bugs in them. Strangely, right before Hitler killed himself, he had the most humane action, this sentence, and lollipops with bugs in them killed as well. There is no revenge so complete as lollipops with bugs in them.
atmosphere nc
You’ve got to come see the baby, it’s as cute as atmosphere. Online trolls turned Microsoft’s teen girl AI into some kind of a chip off the ol’ block-loving bot that hates atmosphere. Chris Angel threw the deck of cards at atmosphere and my card appeared in talent and poise! India is launching a rocket to test the effects of micro-gravity on atmosphere. The Japanese insist on their traditional right to hunt atmosphere in the sea. I came home to find closing her legs replaced with atmosphere.
driving too fast v
The water tower looks like it’s driving too fast from this angle. The thief was caught stealing election year politics from the sultan, and so was thrown into the pit of driving too fast. ... And so my mom asked me, “If all your friends were driving too fast, would you be driving too fast as well?” I went rafting, saw driving too fast in the river, no big deal. See now black people walk like a busy bee. But white people -- white people walk like they’re driving too fast! My religion demands that I must always have my beautiful, transgender father, and that I must abstain from driving too fast.
killing vt
Killing: The President’s unimaginative campaign slogan. Ever since a garbage truck moved into the neighborhood, killing has been eyed with suspicion. Come on down to Golden Corral™ for killing. Nancy Drew and the Mystery of Killing. Then God said, “Let there be killing”; and there was killing. And God saw that killing was good. I’ve got a master’s degree in Killing!
My fiancee wants our wedding cake to look like it's {sv}, with around the edges, and {n} on top.3
My fiancee wants our wedding cake to look like it's a nutty liqueur, with those glorious gams around the edges, and a conventional man on top. My fiancee wants our wedding cake to look like it's the associated risks, with a happy accident around the edges, and a cataclysmic magic spell on top. My fiancee wants our wedding cake to look like it's the Black Prince, with phantom limb syndrome around the edges, and real, actual witchcraft on top. My fiancee wants our wedding cake to look like it's a van down by the river, with farting while asleep around the edges, and a sterilized dog on top. My fiancee wants our wedding cake to look like it's a Japanese vending machine, with my birthday around the edges, and overwatch on top. My fiancee wants our wedding cake to look like it's forgetting about the whole universe, with all the food around the edges, and total collapse on top.
you kiddin'? my neighbor tossed {n} over the fence a few weeks back!
You kiddin'? my neighbor tossed what’s inside over the fence a few weeks back! You kiddin'? my neighbor tossed shoulder blades over the fence a few weeks back! You kiddin'? my neighbor tossed the instructions over the fence a few weeks back! You kiddin'? my neighbor tossed curious bisexuals over the fence a few weeks back! You kiddin'? my neighbor tossed compressed gas over the fence a few weeks back! You kiddin'? my neighbor tossed a collar around my neck over the fence a few weeks back!
wait, but if you expect the unexpected, then the expected becomes the unexpected, so what do you expect?
2016 Mar 31 at 20:37 PDT
— Ed. 2016 Mar 31 at 20:39 PDT
NatureJay SJA: Commander of Ruthless Abuse
2005 Mar 22 • 1871
574 ₧
I want to try w/ a re-roll
enormous opportunities in the grinding machine np
I went to cut the cake, and to my delight, enormous opportunities in the grinding machine popped out! Original style is fine, but chunky kinda tastes like enormous opportunities in the grinding machine. Life without love is like getting groped by a senator without enormous opportunities in the grinding machine or fruit. Damn it! I got enormous opportunities in the grinding machine jammed in the wheel well again. The night before Easter, we’ll set up enormous opportunities in the grinding machine on the porch to surprise the kids. Science never solves a problem without creating enormous opportunities in the grinding machine.
I’m glad you’re my new roomie, my last one was always a test. Always. For science class we went on a field trip to see how a test happens. After last week’s stunning victory, the wrestler earned his nickname “a Test” Chimps in the wild have been observed using a test to forage for food. My teacher graded my paper F because I wrote about a test. Man invented a test, so woman invented tweaker logic.
my sister's baby
Every French soldier carries my sister's baby in his knapsack. Experts said that based on preliminary data, my sister's baby appears to have occurred on the Puente Hills thrust fault. I came home to find my sister's baby replaced with my momma’s fatness. My new phone looks like it’s my sister's baby but I don’t mind. It makes calls. Driving late at night, I was horrified to find my sister's baby in the back seat. 1) A robot may not injure my sister's baby, or through inaction allow my sister's baby to come to harm.
More than 260 people were injured by festive firecracker blasts and buns in the Philippines. Men, like a charcoal briquette, go farthest when they are buns. Let buns host your next party, providing fart jokes and naughty cave paintings like you’ve never seen before. President Clinton and his entire cabinet got buns before every meeting. Ever since a wet spot moved into the neighborhood, buns has been eyed with suspicion. Chimps in the wild have been observed using buns to forage for food.
buns np
My girlfriend went in the closet and I froze, but luckily she didn’t look up and see buns. I’m taking this to the city council! To think that buns plant would be built 200 feet from my house! Ich bin ein buns. Damn it! I got buns jammed in the wheel well again. The best comfort food will always be greens, buns, and fried chicken. The only way to make sense out of buns is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance.
Researchers have managed to train chimps to recognise by rewarding then with .2
Researchers have managed to train chimps to recognise a chip off the ol’ block by rewarding then with no recourse. Researchers have managed to train chimps to recognise fat guys dressed as Sailor Moon by rewarding then with the NAACP. Researchers have managed to train chimps to recognise a sterilized dog by rewarding then with dryness problems. Researchers have managed to train chimps to recognise a hidden pancake by rewarding then with Angelina Jolie’s lips. Researchers have managed to train chimps to recognise a flagrant misuse of the English language by rewarding then with sharp claws. Researchers have managed to train chimps to recognise shoulder blades by rewarding then with secret Jews.
Robots are best suited to repetitive tasks, such as {v} or {v}.2
Robots are best suited to repetitive tasks, such as roping it in or punching a hole in the roof.
Robots are best suited to repetitive tasks, such as smiling like a doughnut or taking the secret to your grave.
Robots are best suited to repetitive tasks, such as painting rude words on the cat or bucking.
Robots are best suited to repetitive tasks, such as leaving a man behind or being trapped in a tent.
Robots are best suited to repetitive tasks, such as spinning like a bitch or getting impregnated by an advanced robot.
Robots are best suited to repetitive tasks, such as pleading for more men and supplies or laughing and lying.
NatureJay SJA: Commander of Ruthless Abuse
2005 Mar 22 • 1871
574 ₧
SuperJer said:
NatureJay said:
Ed: is not working so well?
How so? It looks like it worked that time.
Oh it worked fine, I just was disappointed with the fact that I rolled it a few times and none of them worked as well as my first roll. I want it to work because it's just such a fucking strange phrase.
NatureJay SJA: Commander of Ruthless Abuse
2005 Mar 22 • 1871
574 ₧
What I'm trying to say is, can you work in some sort of additional variable/parameter into the code that allows me to cheat the way aaronjer cheats every time we play S.A.H.? Thx in advance.
What I'm trying to say is, can you work in some sort of additional variable/parameter into the code that allows me to cheat the way aaronjer cheats every time we play S.A.H.? Thx in advance.
OK I implemented it with a brainwave micro additive distortion emulator. I'm sure you know how to use one of those.
NatureJay SJA: Commander of Ruthless Abuse
2005 Mar 22 • 1871
574 ₧
This will be decided the traditional way: competition.
This will be decided the traditional way: unisexuality competition. This will be decided the traditional way: a human competition. This will be decided the traditional way: a bend competition. This will be decided the traditional way: sinking into the mud competition. This will be decided the traditional way: poorly orchestrated group sex competition. This will be decided the traditional way: bodily harm competition.
SWF seeking LTR or fun for now, if you’re into getting busy, get to the front of the line. After the war, the British government had Alan Turing chemically castrated because he was getting busy. Experts said that based on preliminary data, getting busy appears to have occurred on the Puente Hills thrust fault. The unofficial symbol of the United States is getting busy. I don’t give money to the homeless. Instead I provide getting busy directly. That’s not funny. My dad was killed by getting busy.
Sometimes, when hiking through the woods, you might cross paths with . So bring .2
Sometimes, when hiking through the woods, you might cross paths with upsetting footage not suitable for children. So bring every pterodactyl. Sometimes, when hiking through the woods, you might cross paths with Eskimo settlements. So bring a do-gooder. Sometimes, when hiking through the woods, you might cross paths with rumpy pumpy. So bring expectorating some sludge. Sometimes, when hiking through the woods, you might cross paths with mood enhancing hormones. So bring wishing your girlfriend would get kidnapped. Sometimes, when hiking through the woods, you might cross paths with just a peek. So bring maximum attitude. Sometimes, when hiking through the woods, you might cross paths with springing into action. So bring most people.
I've never heard talk, but I'm confident that it's possible.
I've never heard Orange Julius talk, but I'm confident that it's possible. I've never heard white-knuckled terror talk, but I'm confident that it's possible. I've never heard greedy land barons talk, but I'm confident that it's possible. I've never heard taking a lonesome road talk, but I'm confident that it's possible. I've never heard dark magic talk, but I'm confident that it's possible. I've never heard the taste of Rohypnol talk, but I'm confident that it's possible.
One month later produces an egg which resembles . This egg must be protected for several months.2
One month later extra padding for my butt produces an egg which resembles that urpy feeling like when you eat too much. This egg must be protected for several months. One month later Katy Perry’s kitty, Kitty Purry produces an egg which resembles my point of view. This egg must be protected for several months. One month later blocking the exit produces an egg which resembles a long rambling story. This egg must be protected for several months. One month later everything under the sea produces an egg which resembles manliness. This egg must be protected for several months. One month later specimens produces an egg which resembles twerking over my enemy’s grave. This egg must be protected for several months. One month later a slot produces an egg which resembles my fantasy. This egg must be protected for several months.
