NatureJay
SJA: Commander of Ruthless Abuse
2005 Mar 23 • 1871
574 ₧
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Was thinking while working:
White Card:
Tantric sex.
Black Cards:
Ponce de Leone originally sailed to Florida in search of _____.
Evidence indicates that the ships crew subsisted on ____ before beginning to devour each other.
I'm also proposing that for the time being we use black and white card submissions as replacements over additions. I'd like to achieve more of an equilibrium where people aren't groaning when they see or draw certain cards. That's probably going to lead to some annoying vetting process, but so be it.
100% natural, no antibiotics, and bloodgrass-fed
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2014 Jun 9 at 08:19 UTC
— Ed. 2014 Jun 9 at 08:37 UTC
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Nezumi
Asshole Admin
2005 Mar 27 • 819
175 ₧
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We need metrics!
Getting Elo for white cards would be awesome. I also thought it would be useful to track how long each white card stays in someone's hand on average.
I think I mentioned this in our last game, but the voting +/- buttons on black cards should always be visible.
aaaand we need to release to a wide audience to get a big sample size for all this. I guess this is probably a lot of work? I'm really curious though to see what happens when a wide audience plays our white and black cards.
Also, white card: fist murder
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2014 Jun 9 at 21:32 UTC
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Elo yes. I need to read up on how to do it though.
I also want to make the card submitter / editor.
Wide audience: also yes. But I need to do load testing and probably switch servers and httpd software first. Maybe even move it to THE CLOUD!
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2014 Jun 9 at 23:32 UTC
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Nezumi
Asshole Admin
2005 Mar 27 • 819
175 ₧
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A tarted up hussy
An uppity tranny
Butt slappin'
Puppets gettin' busy
How much work would it be to move the game to another server or THE CLOUD?
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2014 Jun 10 at 08:01 UTC
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Moving to my fast server: easy.
Moving to a cloud server: easy.
Moving to 2+ cloud servers: hard.
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2014 Jun 10 at 18:14 UTC
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White card: a complete lack of pomp and circumstance
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2014 Jun 11 at 00:43 UTC
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NatureJay
SJA: Commander of Ruthless Abuse
2005 Mar 23 • 1871
574 ₧
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Entering a pupal state, not knowing or understanding the end result.
100% natural, no antibiotics, and bloodgrass-fed
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2014 Jun 11 at 06:25 UTC
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A dickward glance.
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2014 Jun 11 at 10:14 UTC
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NatureJay said: Entering a pupal state, not knowing or understanding the end result.
Is that from a nature show?
I wonder if it would sound better with just "knowing" or just "understanding." To me it sounds more implicative.
Nature show!:
When the time comes to spin the cocoon in which it will spend the winter, it must decide whether to go up _, or down.
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2014 Jun 11 at 20:44 UTC
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NatureJay
SJA: Commander of Ruthless Abuse
2005 Mar 23 • 1871
574 ₧
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SuperJer said: NatureJay said: Entering a pupal state, not knowing or understanding the end result.
Is that from a nature show?
I wonder if it would sound better with just "knowing" or just "understanding." To me it sounds more implicative.
If you want to choose between the two, that's fine.
It's not from a nature show though. Nez got superpowers on account of there being a chemical spill near his work and I was trying to guess at what some really shitty superpowers were that he might have received. On the level of "body horror" and "who knows what the utility of this is", entering a pupal state not knowing if the results would be good or bad seemed like a pretty amazing shitty superpower.
100% natural, no antibiotics, and bloodgrass-fed
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2014 Jun 11 at 22:08 UTC
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aaronjer
*****'n Admin
2005 Mar 21 • 5102
1,227 ₧
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SuperJer said: When the time comes to spin the cocoon in which it will spend the winter, it must decide whether to go up _, or down _.
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2014 Jun 11 at 22:53 UTC
— Ed. 2014 Jun 11 at 22:53 UTC
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Nezumi
Asshole Admin
2005 Mar 27 • 819
175 ₧
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my buttcheeks, pressed against the cold glass
(Or simply 'buttcheeks, pressed against the cold glass'. I can't decide which one is funnier more often)
sensual oil
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2014 Jun 12 at 06:49 UTC
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an unabridged copy of "Courtesy and Cochise: A Lady's Guide to Etiquette"
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2014 Jun 12 at 07:20 UTC
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aaronjer
*****'n Admin
2005 Mar 21 • 5102
1,227 ₧
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Foopy Parts
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2014 Jun 12 at 08:36 UTC
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Nezumi
Asshole Admin
2005 Mar 27 • 819
175 ₧
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a mouthful of sick
(As in: So long as you have a mouthful of sick in your mouth, you have solved all questions for the time being.
or
The new hit reality show: Can You Swallow a mouthful of sick?
or
Love makes a mouthful of sick crawl out from its hiding place.)
bowels gone wild
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2014 Jun 13 at 19:06 UTC
— Ed. 2014 Jun 14 at 01:57 UTC
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Only _____ can absolve your sins.
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2014 Jun 14 at 03:49 UTC
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Nezumi
Asshole Admin
2005 Mar 27 • 819
175 ₧
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a boiling mass of spiders
("This is my second kid. My first one came out as a boiling mass of spiders.")
grit, twigs and bits of gravel
("But of the tree of the knowledge of grit, twigs, and bits of gravel and door hinges, nails and chopped up horseshoes you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat of it you shall surely die."
TRUE
FACTS)
Also someone tell me if this white card works:
bodily humors, not like 'haha' humors
It's a little long, but I like all the extra punctuation and such. I think that stuff can change the context of the black card in interesting ways.
Maybe 'funny, but not like 'haha' funny' is just plain better.
(When the beef came at me it was like funny, but not like 'haha' funny.)
strange bedfellows
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2014 Jun 20 at 20:00 UTC
— Ed. 2014 Jun 21 at 01:55 UTC
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NatureJay
SJA: Commander of Ruthless Abuse
2005 Mar 23 • 1871
574 ₧
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Black crawdads:
When I grow up, I want to be ____.
The new model of the Karatron 8 Billion has a severe reduction in energy consumption and is now powered solely by _____.
100% natural, no antibiotics, and bloodgrass-fed
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2014 Jun 23 at 04:05 UTC
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Nezumi
Asshole Admin
2005 Mar 27 • 819
175 ₧
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twincest
All y'all scrubs better recognize, I'm the King of _.
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2014 Jun 25 at 05:43 UTC
— Ed. 2014 Jun 26 at 10:00 UTC
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head games
a stroller
the palm of your hand
how I smuggled heroin into prison
I don't know what part of speech that last one is, but it works in a lot of cards.
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2014 Jun 26 at 18:44 UTC
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Nezumi
Asshole Admin
2005 Mar 27 • 819
175 ₧
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It's kinda adverby?
"... and so then in my dream _ appeared. But it wasn't _ I was used to. And then the dream got weird."
(A one-fer, obviously)
Also, I haven't tested these yet, but:
Subliminal commands from the moon
Catheter mistakes
looking fabulous, and feeling fabulous
(Edit: They've been tested now, don't worry)
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2014 Jun 27 at 10:52 UTC
— Ed. 2014 Jun 30 at 22:28 UTC
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2014 Jul 1 at 02:18 UTC
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Nezumi
Asshole Admin
2005 Mar 27 • 819
175 ₧
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Thanks to Aaronjer: my hot boy routine
brooding young in the mouth
my cloaca
kids swearin' like sailors
A blood oath sworn on the grave of my ancestors
As it was prophesied, _ shall be the sign heralding the new age.
a portal that spews monsters every 3,000 years
a cup of my sweet blood
(For example: "Give a man a cup of my sweet blood, and you feed him for a day.")
a chalice of blood (Maybe redundant? I thought of these at different times though...)
The threshold of instant death (thank you mythbusters)
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2014 Jul 4 at 01:14 UTC
— Ed. 2014 Aug 15 at 09:04 UTC
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Crytax said: WHITE CARDS:
The most intimate details for your life.
Rhythmic pounding
Inviting the cops!
The year of the cat.
Befuddlin' mah dumb cracker mind!
35-year-old high school students
FUTURISTIC SPACE SHIP!
A van down by the river.
One night in Bangkok.
A planet where apes evolved from men.
A GODDAMN SEXASAURUS REX!
The rusted chassis of a '68 Impala!
Slash and burn shaving.
A finely sculpted buttocks.
Chocolate chip juice.
Hula hoops and dungarees.
Wall-mounted keyboards.
A madhouse! A madhouse!
MY SKULL!
My judo bikini
Huge Angular Red Marshmallows.
Skeet Kendo
Solid balsawood, baby!
A battalion of ruthless killer cyborgs.
Vietnam War 2.
Braunschweiger, cars with heaters that don't work, and identification papers
Ultimate test of cerebral fitness.
A healthy eight-and-a-half-pound pork roast.
The battle between good and evil.
Giant Puppet Invasion!
Countrytime Pink Lemonade
Buns of Steel videos.
An electron sex party.
The "World of Barnacles" exhibit.
A respected neurosurgeon!
A three room Japanese apartment.
Noble band of choreographers.
The Roji-Panty Complex.
BLACK CARDS:
Doctor! We need to get the ___ out of the ___
I got kicked out of the party because ____
Between the time of ___ and the rise of ___, there was an age undreamed of.
If ___ is sure to result in victory, then you must fight.
This will turn you into ___
Whaddya know — we aren't at war with ____.
Men should not have___.
Put ___ in your mouth and clap your hands.
Attention, people of Earth! This is ____speaking!
Arrgh! Sixteen men on ___!
Ladies and Gentlemen, I'm going to suggest to this man that ___ is in danger.
____ is useless, but scare the crap outta me anyway.
Your attempt to get little Susie what's-her-name drunk on lime vodka ended with___
How dare you insult my knowledge of___!
Have you been shaving ___ with this again?
At the end of the day, as long as there's two people left on the planet, someone's going to want___.
___ Now that's a porno name if I ever head one! Not that I've ever heard one!
That's not ___. THIS, is ___.
___? Well, as long as they learn to taste good, I don't really care.
There is only one rule in ____. ____!
____ said no one ever.
I met a strange lady, she made me nervous. She took me in and gave me___.
Be honest with us. ___ really gets your blood going.
Back to the rusting septic system of this____.
Its like a ___. You don't want to stare, but you cant look away.
It's ___ that that Yeats spoke of.
___ The President's unimaginative campaign slogan.
You think you can't get hurt, Doctor, because this is America? ____ and all that jazz?
That is not a woman! That's___!
My job is to keep ____ on the table, and nobody asks me how I do it!
___. . . it must be the future!
You know how some movies inspire you to make your own movie? This one inspires me to make ____
Her mother doesn't like anything. Especially____.
___ stars as ___ in this years most thrilling, action packed, cyber adventure.
I'm starting to agree with the Taliban militia: ___ should not be allowed.
There is three kinds of ___. Those who seek strength. Those who live for pride. And those who are___.
___ has become a killing word.
The only thing needed for ___ to triumph is for good men to do nothing.
Now is not the time for ___. That comes later.
Forward progress is made with a snake-like slither and a vigorous thrashing of ___.
One town's very like another when your head's down over ___, brother
Does the Coast Guard have a lot of use for___?
Every year of my life, I grow more and more convinced that the wisest and best is to fix our attention on ___ and ___...
Alright ___ , you're up. Make us proud.
___ makes a hard man humble.
You are ___ compared to me!
I thought I was being attacked, and I defended myself with ____.
These names are all Russian for____.
So, the premise of this movie is that everyone is____.
When ___ is in ashes, you have my permission to die.
You didn't think you were the only one? ___ was the first ___.
This could've been you, and don't you forget it! Better go back to ___.
If ___ were in the Olympics, Finland would be in great shape!
Life is short. Life is hard. Life is like ____
The KGB has ___under surveillance!
Whoa! I didn't think they had many ____ left in Narnia!
I am judge, jury, and ___.
What if ___ was the best a man could get?
Huh, would you look at that: ____! Even had it underlined!
Hey, I'm experiencing___, and frankly... I LOVE IT!
I hope ___ didn't land on ____ in the front yard.
This ____ can be yours if The Price is Right!
This movie is just ___ and asses!
___ in the projection room! Guess we can't watch the movie!
I get my ___above the waistline, sunshine!
Typical Irishmen, bringing ____ to a car fight!
Well, they couldn't shoot at night because the night belongs to ___.
Throughout human history, ____ has been the first activity of explorers of any new region.
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2014 Sep 7 at 00:17 UTC
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Thank you?
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2014 Sep 9 at 03:29 UTC
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