Nezumi
Asshole Admin
2005 Mar 27 • 817
175 ₧
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superjer said: "Well he's like an old granny at a retirement home in Chicago."
"On indefinite stay."
"He doesn't have memory loss, he has gained memories."
"He used to live on the 3rd floor, but now he lives on the side floor."
"His room has 3 windows but they're above the ceiling."
"And he talks to the TV all day, even when it's off."
For the record, various of those statements are true.
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2008 Feb 24 at 09:02 UTC
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aaronjer
*****'n Admin
2005 Mar 21 • 5046
1,227 ₧
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Hey Biggins. What the fuck ever happened to you drawing a picture of that skeleton? Honestly. My disappointment grows exponentially with every passing day. It will reach critical 'sorrow' mass and cause the majority of the population of Earth to commit suicide if you don't do something.
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2008 May 1 at 06:33 UTC
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Down Rodeo
Cap'n Moth of the Firehouse
2007 Oct 19 • 5486
57,583 ₧
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That's like two months of exponential sorrow! The suicide rate in AaronJer's neighbourhood has already quadrupled!
I like the word quadrupled.
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2008 May 1 at 08:59 UTC
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aaronjer
*****'n Admin
2005 Mar 21 • 5046
1,227 ₧
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Quadrupled.
Quadrupled...
Quadrupled.
Me too. We should be friends.
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2008 May 1 at 09:17 UTC
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eDan Co.
Mighty Typist
2007 Sep 24 • 2921
252 ₧
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Quintupled!
All right...Giggity!
May contain traces of invisible text.
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2008 May 1 at 14:15 UTC
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Down Rodeo
Cap'n Moth of the Firehouse
2007 Oct 19 • 5486
57,583 ₧
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Octupled.
There. I win.
I don't think that that's a word actually, but go me! for taking it too far.
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2008 May 1 at 23:53 UTC
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Down Rodeo
Cap'n Moth of the Firehouse
2007 Oct 19 • 5486
57,583 ₧
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eDan Ltd., prop. Edan Coll said: All right...Giggity!
Who else but Quagmire?
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2008 May 1 at 23:54 UTC
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ohh yes let the sorrow grow ! world wide suicide ! MUAHAHAHA
anyway never got around to making the full big-ass-A2-paper-colored-cool-looking-drawing-that-would-take
-a-lot-of-time
all i have is a sketch drawing on a4 paper ( black 'n white ) i completely forgot about it
but what the heck , ill go to some store for a scanner ( me having no money is not gonna be a problem )
Wtf is that ? its a bird ! no its a plane ! amm maybe its a plastic bag . NO ! its SUPERJER ! the greatest super hero ever!
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2008 May 2 at 11:24 UTC
— Ed. 2008 May 2 at 11:26 UTC
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CornJer
Metal does cocaine.
2005 Mar 21 • 1531
36 ₧
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If I ever get off my ass I just might go and draw a pencil of the skeleton guy. So encourage me.
If you jump high enough you'll hurt your ankles when you land.
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2008 May 4 at 17:02 UTC
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Down Rodeo
Cap'n Moth of the Firehouse
2007 Oct 19 • 5486
57,583 ₧
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CornJer said: So encourage me.
Whoo, yeah, you can do this! Go CornJer!
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2008 May 4 at 22:09 UTC
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aaronjer
*****'n Admin
2005 Mar 21 • 5046
1,227 ₧
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Even if you can't believe in yourself, believe that we all believe in you. Do it for us. Do it for yourself! Do it for our children's future's freedom!!
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2008 May 5 at 00:51 UTC
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Down Rodeo
Cap'n Moth of the Firehouse
2007 Oct 19 • 5486
57,583 ₧
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aaronjer said: Do it for our children's future's freedom!!
Freedom, maybe; but they're very screwed regardless. Unless you live in council flats in Glasgow in which case it's already here.
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2008 May 5 at 01:19 UTC
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aaronjer
*****'n Admin
2005 Mar 21 • 5046
1,227 ₧
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Just woke up from one heck of a dream at 1:00 PM PST today. This is what I managed to write down before forgetting all the details. I usually don't get 3 hours to remember and write! I was lucky today! Not nearly as good as the last one, though. I don't remember any of the dialogue except one line...
--------------------------------------------------------
I title this dream: The Witch of Faraxia. Because she was the only person with a name.
The Witch of Faraxia is a very old (like hundreds of years old) woman from a long destroyed city called Faraxia. Everyone just thinks her name is 'Faraxia' because of the fact that they've never heard of the city Faraxia. She is supposedly very good at summoning spirits and gods into a physical form. She wore a brown hooded robe, sported stringy grey hair, and you couldn't ever see her eyes due to the hood.
The very first thing that happens in this dream is that she tries to summon me into a physical form. I was the the sorcerer king of ancient Faraxia, long dead from the time of the terrible catastrophe that left the entire city permanently frozen in ice. As we all know, sorcerer kings are ALWAYS evil, so her summoning of me was probably a bad idea. She was unable to summon me into a physical form. She could only grant me an ethereal body that could have little effect on the world. I didn't get a good look at myself in this form, but I could see that my hands were transparent and skeletal. I can only assume I was very much like the popular image of a 'phantasm'. I looked for a mirror, but the dark hole of a room she summoned me into didn't have much in the way of decorations. Other than the magical symbols drawn on the floor, of course.
Apparently everyone who died in Faraxia is nearly impossible to summon because a god is specifically keeping them all from leaving the afterlife. In most cases Faraxia's people would be unsummonable, but I was 'pushing from the other side' so to speak, and could at least come back as a ghostie. I had been a last resort for the Witch, she really didn't want to risk summoning me. But she wanted to bring her daughter back from the dead before she herself died of old age and she couldn't break the god's curse on her own. I told her that I would help her out of spite for the god that was keeping me from coming back into the living world. This actually quite true. What I didn't tell her was that I was going to possess during the ceremony to resurrect her daughter. She'd be unable to defend herself if she wanted her daughter back, so she'd be an easy target and a very powerful physical medium for me.
Everything went entirely according to my plan. I possessed the Witch of Faraxia just as her daughter regained physical (and naked, woohoo!) form. This meant that her daughter would never even know I had been summoned, so wouldn't suspect that I wasn't who I looked like. I then had to put up with being unfortunately old, female, and blood-related to this girl. At least this body had the magic mojo equivalent of Super Gandalf. I had to use the majority of my own power keeping the Witch possessed and keeping myself from being torn back into the afterlife by the god who I'm sure was starting to get very disturbed by my prolonged presence in the living world. The Witch's daughter didn't have to worry about the god trying to kick her back to the afterlife again, because the curse keeping her dead was only a side-effect of the curse that was supposed to keep ME dead. The witch's daughter looked like Brigitte Bardot (from the 60's) with black hair. The Witch apparently had kept her daughters personal belongings for the past couple hundred years, because there was an outfit that fit her perfectly laid out on the floor. It was an ornate, silver suit of lorica segmentata with metal greaves and bracers, leather leggings, a long sleeved black tunic and cape and a silver ring that I can only assume was magical in some way. It was heavy armor and unfortunately left much to the imagination. I recognized what she was wearing as the armor of a soldier of Faraxia, probably an officer. Completely breaking with the Roman style of her armor, she carried an English longbow and a hand-axe.
I told the Witch's daughter that I had summoned her so that she could go with me to Faraxia and ask the god to free the city from the freezing curse. She apparently didn't know much about the sorcerer king or why the city had been frozen, so she obliged without resistance. I got the feeling that the Witch didn't know her daughter very well, because she didn't trouble me with many personal conversations that I'd have to improvise with. The Witch's daughter seemed obedient, but somewhat distant and even slightly fearful. Apparently the girl expected her mother to be cold and business-like, so I didn't have to fake much of anything. I thought the fact that I didn't know her name was going to be a huge boulder in the road, but calling her 'you' or just telling her to do things without addressing her didn't upset her.
We traveled to Faraxia on a very uneventful boat, we climbed a few hills and crossed a river or two and even blazed a trail through a forest. It was all terribly boring. I'd just as soon use my magic to instantly transport us to Faraxia, but that's a power that the Witch shouldn't have and it might raise questions. We arrived at the outskirts of the curse hanging over Faraxia. It got cold and fast. There had been moisture in the air so everything was covered in a thin sheet of ice, but it didn't snow here. It was far too cold. I could use a simple sort of spell to keep the both of us from freezing to death (which would've taken less than an hour) and keep us mostly comfortable. Ahead of us was a building that was not covered in magical ice, and so must have been constructed after the freeze. It was a small wooden cabin with a stone chimney, only a couple hundred square feet. The billowing black some could only mean it was inhabited. I had no idea what this could mean. There was no reason why someone would want to try to live here.
The building sheltered a dozen sorceresses in training and their teacher. They were on a pilgrimage to visit their patron god. The same deceitful god who froze my city and killed me! I can't remember what happened, but I'm positive the god had tricked me in some way and that it was the cause of my downfall. They were protected from the fatal temperature by their allegiance or some rituals or something. I didn't know or care very much. I told them we were the last living Faraxians and wished to apologize to their god for what the sorcerer king had done and pledge our allegiance to him. They didn't question my motives.
We traveled into the city, you could barely tell that the city was medieval in style due to them much thicker sheets of ice that covered it. We made our way to the palace in the center of the city. The drawbridge to the palace was completely missing, but the moat was frozen over so you could just walk across. Inside it looked like a barely symmetrical white cavern due to all the ice hanging down. Straight ahead my old throne lay under at least a foot of ice, and a seat made out of ice sat atop it. The sorceresses busied themselves with their ritual to summon their god. This actually worked out quite well for me, because I didn't have to waste any energy summoning him myself. They all merely wished to gaze upon him and receive his blessing.
The god had apparently noticed us interlopers, and would not appear before us unless we proved the strength of our will to see him. From the ice rose a frozen cat-like beast. I sent the Witch's daughter to fight it. I stayed back and imbued her with the strength and speed required to defeat such a creature. This was also a power the Witch shouldn't have, but I was SO close and there weren't any other options. For what seemed like a much longer period of time than it really was, the Witch's daughter fought the monstrosity. The ring I assumed had magical properties could be used like a shield, hold up you hand as if you were holding a shield and it would deflect blows. Her bow was quite useless at this short range, so she fought with axe and 'shield'. The battle continued until the Witch's daughter was unable to continue fighting. The thing didn't kill her, it just pinned her down. The god, fortunately, was impressed with her will to keep fighting and deemed us worthy. The creature atop her shattered into tiny shards and was no more. The god finally appeared, an ethereal cat-like humanoid sitting in the throne of ice. This was very good for me, he was ethereal and was therefore something I could fight without needing to possess the Witch. I burst forth from the Witch in a cloud of dark smoke and floated before my nemesis in phantasmal form. He just looked at me, he clearly recognized who I was, but was apparently waiting for me to make a move.
I menaced, "Shouldn't you be busy murdering your allies and destroying cities? Get outta my seat!"
At this point he stood, and the Dawn of Sorrow version of 'Dance of Illusions' started playing. An amazingly appropriate piece in name and sound for what was happening. I could see my reflection in the ice now. I was a transparent skeleton as I had thought. I was wearing armor similar to the Witch's daughter's, but it was more ornate and much lighter. The armor itself was silver with burgundy highlights. I had a long, burgundy coat on over my armor, not dissimilar to a trench coat but more flared. I had a thin robe under my armor instead of a tunic, it was tied with a belt and obscured my feet entirely. I levitated everywhere I went, so it's not like I had to worry about tripping. When I closed my right fist a sword shimmered into existence. It was transparent as I was and bright white. It was a 19th century saber like what cavalry would carry. The god remained unarmored, but lifted a somewhat crudely formed broadsword of ice out of the ground. As we circled each other for a moment, hovering in the air, thousands of phantasmal being like me appeared in the hall around us. These were the cursed people of Faraxia and the god was apparently too busy focusing his power against me to keep them from coming to watch the fight.
Our actual fight only lasted about a minute and a half. We quickly maneuvered around each other, fading in and out of sight and would clash swords, strike and parry quicker than humanly possible and then back away from each other. We did this three times until he ran me straight through the chest as I attempted to recover from a poorly executed parry. I dropped my sword, used my right hand to grab onto his sword to keep him from pulling away, and turned to face the very confused sorceresses who were watching us fight. I reached out with my left hand and magically sucked the life out of them. They fell to the floor as bones and dust. I glowed very brightly for a moment and crushed the god's sword in my hand. Before he could back away I grabbed his shoulders and similarly sucked the life out of him. He turned very pale and hung in the air barely able to lift his head enough to look at me. Without a word from either of us I rematerialized my sword in my hand and cut him vertically in two. He shattered and disappeared.
The ice faded away and the cursed spirits of the dead went with it. I used the life I sucked from the god to reform my living body and happily strolled over to my throne. The Witch hadn't died from my possession, and had managed to stand at this point. Her daughter had sat up and was obviously totally confused about what had just happened. The Witch looked angry as if she intended to do something about me, but I told her that she and her daughter were both still alive and that they had better not even complain. She told me that I would doom the entire world with my war against the gods, but I thought otherwise. It's true I had a penchant for angering the gods, but now that I had killed one it was unlikely that the others would risk themselves in an attempt to chastise me. This is where I woke up and started furiously writing.
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2008 Jul 22 at 06:10 UTC
— Ed. 2008 Jul 22 at 06:12 UTC
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I refuse to read that huge thing.I will later though.Its 3 am at the moment.
Make awkward sexual advances, not war. Down Rodeo said: Dammit, this was the one place that didn't have this, but noooooo, molkman pisses all over that
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2008 Jul 22 at 06:43 UTC
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aaronjer
*****'n Admin
2005 Mar 21 • 5046
1,227 ₧
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If you're going to put forth all of your meager brain power and read a long post, read the first dream I had. It's a lot better.
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2008 Jul 22 at 08:37 UTC
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eDan Co.
Mighty Typist
2007 Sep 24 • 2921
252 ₧
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I would love to dream shit like that. Although, it seems that most of your dream is you reading minds. I mean, it's all feelings, not actions. So, umm... yeah.
EDIT: "brown hooded robe". Is that a brown robe that has a hood, or a robe that has a brown hood?
May contain traces of invisible text.
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2008 Jul 22 at 13:23 UTC
— Ed. 2008 Jul 22 at 13:24 UTC
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Down Rodeo
Cap'n Moth of the Firehouse
2007 Oct 19 • 5486
57,583 ₧
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eDan Co. said: EDIT: "brown hooded robe". Is that a brown robe that has a hood, or a robe that has a brown hood?
Both, I'd guess :p
Nice writeup though. You could make books out of these things; you already have the source material. Now you only have to make engaging characters vivid descriptions and all the other easy stuff that is writing a book!
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2008 Jul 22 at 15:59 UTC
— Ed. 2008 Jul 22 at 15:59 UTC
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aaronjer
*****'n Admin
2005 Mar 21 • 5046
1,227 ₧
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Like I said, the previous one was a lot better. I could only remember this one vaguely. All I had was the plot by the time I started writing, that and a few random details about people that came to me during the dream.
The one before it I remembered far, far better... the whole first post about it is very nearly verbatim of what happened. I've only had dreams I could remember that well 2 or 3 times. As I may have mentioned, I'm not particularly creative without my dreams, so I can't really turn it into an actual story... unless I have another dream on the same topic. Which has happened, actually.
Oh, and aren't dreams usually mostly just feelings? Only when a dream is really lucid do actions feel like they're actually occurring and I'm not just thinking about them. The actions mentioned in this one, like the fight with that god, were things that actually felt like they happened. I really do tend to spend a lot of time in dreams just thinking about what I'm going to do next with whatever scheme I'm on.
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2008 Jul 22 at 19:24 UTC
— Ed. 2008 Jul 22 at 19:26 UTC
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Down Rodeo
Cap'n Moth of the Firehouse
2007 Oct 19 • 5486
57,583 ₧
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Apparently you remember dreams better if you tell yourself to remember them before you go to sleep. It seems to work; I remembered one fairly well when I did it once.
In reference to content it probably varies from person to person, my dream that I remembered rather well took place in my old school. Of course it was at night and there was a railway line through it. Trains would stop every so often and drop off bones. I was very interested in this; I woke up before I could see the trains up close though.
See that dream was probably partially inspired by the fact that the school was refurbished recently but finished after I left; what remains unexplained however is why I thought I had maths (despite knowing all the way through the dream that I was just visiting) but found those classes full so went to the science department upstairs (also full, I popped into a classroom, had some decent banter with my sister's classmates and saw those boney trains) then started to head downstairs to the social. At this point I suddenly realised that I had an anorak on which I hadn't before and presumably due to the logical inconsistencies of that situation woke up.
And finally (this post is longer than I ever thought it would be) you have most of the fiction there, particularly from the first dream. Hell, you could probably mix the two together and still have a consistent fiction. I find that it is the initial idea that is hardest to find; after that things can flow somewhat more easily. Like having a who, where, what and basic why is often enough to get the ball rolling.
We should totally have another forum story. So long as it was kept, you know, decent. No overt silliness etc. (See CornJer's, starts well then descends into madness. CornJer makes a good save but then the story peters out.)
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2008 Jul 22 at 20:42 UTC
— Ed. 2008 Jul 22 at 20:44 UTC
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aaronjer
*****'n Admin
2005 Mar 21 • 5046
1,227 ₧
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We can always just set a few ground rules for it, like:
No Havokk.
No any of the other people that would ruin it.
I'll delete any posts we deem not good enough.
Seriously, it'll probably just be me, you, Edan, CornJer, MAYBE SuperJer and possibly Enjay. If I'm forgetting Biggins and Molkman, I'm sorry.
We can try to keep things like famous people out of it, keep it entirely fictional in it's own world.
Make sure the main character, if there is one, has a few basic character traits that are made obvious right away, and if somebody breaks one of those without a REALLY good reason, their post will be removed.
We could also have a competition over who writes the next section. Keep it under 1000 words or something, and we all vote on which one we like best? Only rule would be it can't be the same person twice in a row.
Stuff like that.
Seriously, no Havokk.
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2008 Jul 22 at 22:13 UTC
— Ed. 2008 Jul 22 at 22:14 UTC
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NatureJay
SJA: Commander of Ruthless Abuse
2005 Mar 23 • 1871
574 ₧
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So remember that dream I had where gun-toting Walt Whitman was following me around?
Two days ago I had a guy who looked like Walt Whitman following me around in a brown sedan from the 70s-80s while I was at work.
I can't seem to remember any of the wacky dreams I've had in the past few days though.
100% natural, no antibiotics, and bloodgrass-fed
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2008 Jul 22 at 22:29 UTC
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Down Rodeo
Cap'n Moth of the Firehouse
2007 Oct 19 • 5486
57,583 ₧
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AJ: Sounds good. I vote you to start it based on one of your dreams :p
NJ: Still taking those pills? If yes, stop; if no, try them again :D
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2008 Jul 22 at 23:11 UTC
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NatureJay
SJA: Commander of Ruthless Abuse
2005 Mar 23 • 1871
574 ₧
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Southern Rhodesia: I've been taking the pills continuously for over a year now. I doubt they have anything to do with it. Nor does it seem that my alcohol consumption has much to do it, after repeated testing.
100% natural, no antibiotics, and bloodgrass-fed
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2008 Jul 22 at 23:20 UTC
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Down Rodeo
Cap'n Moth of the Firehouse
2007 Oct 19 • 5486
57,583 ₧
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2008 Jul 22 at 23:45 UTC
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aaronjer
*****'n Admin
2005 Mar 21 • 5046
1,227 ₧
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But then it would be like people were writing fan-fiction for my brain. Wouldn't that be too weird?
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2008 Jul 23 at 00:16 UTC
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