Wow, a whole lot of crap happened in this episode and technically it's another stand-alone. However, when the focus is completely on character development, I'm definately not complaining! There's a big difference between the stand-alone style of "Living Conditions" (4x02), where there's very little character insight, to this one. Spike's back, Harmony's a vampire, Buffy and Parker have sex, Xander and Anya have sex, and more. There's a lot to talk about, so lets begin!

While we get some interesting material involving Anya and Harmony, the focus here is squarely on Buffy. She goes through quite the emotional roller coaster and it's all perfectly woven into the main story, which comes off as weak and irrelevant compared to all the other things happening. The episode begins at the Bronze with Buffy checking out Parker from his reflection. This is a tested technique which I myself have used on a few occasions. Willow then gets her to admit that she is "having lusty wrong feelings" towards Parker. Willow tells her it's not wrong to have those feelings because they're both "grown-ups," but I think she is wrong here. Some people have sex just for the sex, like Parker, but others want sex to be part of a mutual loving relationship, like Buffy. So jumping into sex based on simply "lusty wrong feelings" isn't very smart for Buffy -- it only results in her feeling dramatically hurt.

The big problem with Parker is that he doesn't just come out and say he just wants sex. He manipulates Buffy into thinking he's a considerate nice guy who actually does want a serious relationship. Normally I'd say that Buffy's too smart to be duped by this routine, but I've got to admit, Parker's got his game down perfectly. When I first watched him talk with her I, like Buffy, thought he was a nice considerate guy. He snags symphathy points from, in retrospect, obviously fake stories about his dad dying and says stuff like "and I'm not doing the deep, get sympathy routine." He is doing the deep, get sympathy routine though, and it is really tough to tell whether or not he's geniune. He takes a chance when saying "It made me think about, you know, living for now" but Buffy buys it and Parker knows he's got a ripe one.

All of that leads to the party where Buffy decides to "make a choice" and have sex with Parker. With Angel gone, life in a dorm, and her desparate want to move past Angel, this decision makes sense. The following morning Parker outright lies to her and says he'll call her later. At this point Buffy feels really good about her decision ("it was nice") and is absolutely excited about developing a real relationship with Parker. Willow is amusingly all excited about what happened and ends up reciting some cliched lines about college being a 'discovery.' It's more or less true for what the characters are experiencing, but I never felt there was much to discover in college aside from how to get my ass kicked by exams in a whole new way. Of course I'm a pretty atypical college student, so maybe imparting my own experiences aren't that useful in this case.

Buffy's personal woes are wonderfully integrated into the search for Spike, which has become a higher priority. While Buffy is searching she is constantly checking her messages, anxiously awaiting Parker's promised call. The call, of course, never comes and Buffy collapses on her bed in pain. She's able to eventually track Parker down and finds him using his sympathy speech on another girl. This is when she fully realises that she just got used and manipulated. Parker says he "had fun," and Buffy replies, "You had fun? Was that all it was?" In Buffy's mind, having sex is a sign of a serious relationship, and a sentiment I certainly agree with. Parker says, "I'm starting to feel like you felt what? Some kind of commitment? Are you sure that's what you want right now?" The truth is, yes, that is what she wants right now. She wants a boyfriend, a lover, and a companion. It pains me tremendously to see Buffy think that Parker's cold reaction is her fault and even apologize to him. I really feel for her and am right there with her in her confusion of the entire situation.

Back in "Surprise" (2x13) I proposed the idea that Buffy simply wasn't emotionally mature enough to have sex yet. That isn't a problem anymore though. The mistake she makes here is that she jumped in the sack with a guy she only knew for a week. Boiled down it is evident that this whole mess is her own fault. Yes, Parker misled and viciously manipulated her into having sex with him, but it still came down to her decision to do the act. She has to deal with the consequences of that action and learn from the experience. Nobody knows how to force Buffy into seeing these consequences better than Spike. In their fight outside he gets some really truthful jabs in and jumps right to the heart of the matter. He says, "So, you let Parker take a poke, eh? Didn't seem like you knew each other that well. What did it take to pry apart the Slayer's dimpled knees? ... Did he play the sensitive lad and get you to seduce him? That's a good trick if the girl's thick enough to buy it." While these comments are blunt and pouring salt in a wound, Spike is completely correct in his analysis of the situation. He also gets her stirred up enough to gain her focus back, especially with his mention of Angel, and grab the gem.

This whole ordeal is succinctly culminated by Willow's helpful "he's a poophead speech." Buffy still wishes that she can make it work with Parker. Even after Parker and Spike's comments she still has trouble believing that someone actually just used her for sex. She still feels that it's her fault Parker doesn't want a relationship with her. Willow reiterates the 'poophead' theory to Buffy again and the topic is settled. I've gone on for so long on this subject because I'm extremely impressed with how carefully, naturally, maturely, and in-character the subject was dealt with. Kudos to the writers for having Buffy's second sexual experience be an important event that's not washed over.

Buffy's not the only one encountering problems on the second sexual encounter. Anya's back in town and is very confused about how relationships develop. She's spent a thousand years inflicting vengeance on the unfaithful, so she knows how to deal with the end of relationships, but the beginning is completely new territory to her. She takes her usual direct approach and succeeds in confusing the hell out of Xander. She comes on strong and he can only respond with "Anya. Slow down there. In fact, come to a screeching halt. See these things kind of have to develop on their own." She then understandably asks, "Okay. How?" Xander then proves he doesn't have any answers: "I don't know. I just - happens." Later on she stops by his room in the basement and, in a hilarious scene, drops all her clothes and proposes to have "sexual intercourse" with him. His response is to squeeze a juicebox empty and shake. To his credit he attempts to resist her nude physical advancement by saying that they aren't ready for this yet, but he quickly gives in. Afterwards they are don't look very satisfied and appear to be even more confused.

We find out that Spike's new girlfriend is Harmony of all people. At first it seems ludicrous that a vampire like Spike would allow himself to be with someone like her, but once we begin to see how their relationship functions, things begin to make more sense. The only way that Harmony can gain Spike's affections is through sex, and we can see that Spike's not satisfied by it at all. He's nice enough to take her out to a party, but after a while his limit is reached and he just stakes her. Fortunately for her she was wearing the gem at the time. Spike's noticeably different now that Drusilla isn't in the picture anymore; he's a lot harsher. Listening to Harmony run on about France all day is likely a large part of why he's acting this way, because in "The Initiative" (4x07) we see his swagger returned to him when he escapes the government lab. Even though Harmony is incredibly annoying, I can't help but feel sorry for her when she remains loyal to Spike and doesn't tell the Scoobies where he is.

It all ends on a really fitting note. We have Buffy, Anya, and Harmony all walking outside, physically near each other, but emotionally isolated. They all seem to realise that sex isn't the key to lasting happiness and that it often leads to much confusion. All in all this is a superb episode which manages to really focus on the characters. My only complaint lies with the main plot of Spike trying to retrieve the gem -- it's just not very interesting. Also, we know Spike isn't going to get to keep something that makes him invincible, so no real tension is generated. All the characters are in a really new and uncomfortable state and the episode successfully reflects that feeling.